07/03/2006 "LONDON AGAIN!" Part 2 eng
This
in order of time is the ultimate experience reported (looks like a medical report), we finally reported at the same! And 'this too long and as usual the party Orlumosa is towards the end, if you read all make me very happy, but if the hormone is too much, you understand! ^ _-
(excuse me, I will update the pictures at another time)
This time I'll put the first version Inglese 'cos it's shorter! As always, please enjoy! ^ __ ^ (Sorry for now images are missing)
Just a word: sorry for my Inglese, for my writing, for my verbs and for all non-existing words I put in this little report. Enjoy! May, Warner Village Cinemas 'cos we love watching movies. Sunday, October 1, 2006
Scooter Wheels Metal Core For Sale
The usual Sandruman, aware of all His Majesty’s movings, gave me the tragic piece of news: Orlondon and his evil presence at the PotC 2 premiere. “...and there’ll be Johnny Depp also!” she told me. “...oh my...NOW I’m all right!...” I told her.
So, a couple of phone calls and web registrations later we bought our tickets to London, departure the 30 of June.
Then came the present: the beautiful spray-gun (or is it called ‘airbrush’?) painting by Sandrumans’ cousin Yellowfast, the quickest slaver-airbrusher (or is it something like spray-gunner? °_°) in the world. And, of course, the flag. “With what kind of slogan are we going to humiliate ourselves this year?” I asked kindly.
But, when we toke off we had both present and flag...and of course fear...of not to be able to see him...the same feeling as usual!
It seems that this year our team will be composed by:
- Sandruman aka Miss_muffin, with the alternative personalities of Mac Guyver and Wonder Woman, and the tasks of pillow raper, burden and four-letter words yeller. - Raffie aka Nanakomatsu: double beds stealer, airport security victim, filthy socks loser and highest Omnitel’s shareholder.
- Rosanna aka Ewyn, our bedroom story teller, culture promoter, japanese photographer and extremities masseuse. - Silvia aka Alles, gust of freshness; she was in charge of smiling happily, being enthusiastic of every corner of London and discourage Sandruman’s four-letter words yelling with a flap of eyelashes.
- Moi aka Belda or Erica if you like, scribe-in-waiting, football maniac (and most of all, football-players maniac), bollocks factory and vice-president of the frappuccino fan club.
We caught up with Alles and Ewyn in London and in the meantime, during the waiting for Orlando ‘take 5 seconds of lead, I’m saying it for your own safety’ Bloom, we devoted ourselves to the beautiful city and its history you know, British Museum, National Gallery, Trafalgar, Downing Street, Westminster Cathedral and stuff like that, led of course by Ewyn the tireless.
...well...with some diversions I guess.
Like what?
...uhm...me licking John Terry’s poster at Piccadilly Circus and yelling with a beer in my hand in any pub that showed some World Cup match or thinking to be Colin Farrell in ‘Phone boot’
...the amazing Gay Pride parade...the Starbucks Tour 2006 with Frappuccino-tasting...running up and down the stairs of Hamleys wearing pirates things giggling like school girls, buying marbles and crying on the PotC Trivial ‘cos we were poor.
We became fond of Enrico VIII and his troop of wives, we almost fought in Camden Town, risked to drown in the fog of our bathroom; Sandruman tried to invent various things with her Mac Guyver personality like, I don’t know, a pizza-oven with nothing else than a drawing pin, a pouch and a wig while Raffie tried to constantly kill herself tripping into wathever came around her feet; all constantly dreaming about Orlamb!
But Ewyn was no Martin Luther King, she didn’t need a dream, she had a plan and went for it the D-day.
For what concerned Alles she hadn’t a dream nor a plan...but she needed mouthguard and boxing gloves if I can tell...
Sunday we all met Tonny, Hendrica and Li for dinner in a beautiful Bistrò to get our strength to face the Fiendish Beeing while Raffie was sweating blood to speak english and believe me I don’t know why someone who sends thousands messages a day in fluent english would even bother to concern!
The day of all days Sandruman, Raffie and I got up at 5 am, proud to be such early risers.
When we got there, around 7 am ALL of the first row was gone.
I started swearing like a mountain man on a wrong path.
Some of them were there from the night before and coming to think about it was obvious...there were also Johnny’ fans.
It looked like there were ONLY Johnny’s fans, you know, like “Orlando? Oh no! I don’t give a fuck of Orlando Bloom! I love Johnny ‘sexy beast’ Depp!”
Well, the Johnny ‘sexy beast’ lovers got what I call an Underwear of Flames reaction when Orlove came, all of them bitching around and wanting his autograph but hey...they didn’t like him.
Anyway (prof Velli, for fuck sake, stop it!!) we had the whole day before us under the sun, with security men spraying us and distributing fresh water.
Early in the afternoon Raffie bursted into tears for no reason at all, dragging poor Tonny with her.
Sandruman slept dribbling over her rucksack, Ewyn took out sun cream, umbrella and studied the surroundings and the quality of the ground in case of a massive charge.
I could not know what Hendrica and Li were doing, guess they were quite fine.
Hendrica gave me a picture of John Terry, wich I kissed and begged for help under the frying rays of the sun.
Calling for Saint Totteeey didn’t help...
So, while PotC 2 Ost played in the background, we fought with the Johnny Depp faction of the Broken Cunts Society Part 2, who started pushing at 2 pm ‘cos we made the outrageous mistake of leaving some air between us and the first row.
But lets head towards the apparition of Orlager.
First came Johnny, white hat, sunglasses, bright clothes, gold teeth and with those Captain Jack Sparrow teeth he smiled to Sandruman who, don’t ask I don’t know, laughed him to scorn...
“What did you do yesterday?”
“Oh, nothing special...bought some lettuce, been at work and laughed Johnny Depp to scorn...”
After that she told me the Phantom Menace was approaching on our left.
Sweet Jesus I can see his hair!!
As usual I’m almost out of my mind, on tiptoe, stretching like a giraffe and on the verge of tears but when he stopped to read the beautiful flag of Tonny and knelt to sign it I really really wanted to jump beyond the barricades and heat his blockhead yelling words of endless love!
I don’t know what that scoundrel did to Li and Hendrica but I presume something terrible for he is evil like a puppy-dog.
While he was signing and killing girls with that (forbidden) smile of his, he din’t notice the shaky hand lurking towards him, and so he held it.
HA! What a mistake!
It was Raffie’s hand and she left the black mark on his palm to find him wherever he goes with her cracken!
Then he came (...) in front of Sandruman and me.
“That’s it! That’s the moment! It’s now or never!! (and no, Elvis, I won’t pay for copyright!)”
In the moment I started screaming “ORLAAANDO!! IT’S FOR YOU!! IT’S A PRESENT!!” Sandruman the opportune, held out the same old copy of the image when we gave him the shirt in London a year ago, for KoH premiere.
He knitted his Jesus Christ eyebrows and help me please, looked confused at the load of things hanging in front of him with a “What? Where?” face, then he saw the crappy copy and made a face like “Uhm...thank...ehm...you...”
“Where are you looking you heap of hair! Here! This! The picture!” I shouted waving 3 pounds of plexiglass painting on his face.
He turned to me, took the gift and smiled “It’s beautiful!”
“It’s handpainted!” I said. And don’t forget it.
And Ewyn “She made it!” pointing Sandruman.
Not the entire truth but there wasn’t enough time to explain.
He turned to Sandruman and asked “You did it?”
“YES!” she said, hoping she understood what he was asking...besides...she would have said yes to anything he could have asked!
Then she ‘carpe diem’ and blew a kiss at him who (hoppers upon him!) curled the upper lip blowing it back to her.
Damn you!
He should give some warning or whatsoever before doing something so dangerous!
I was cheek to cheek with Sandruman and saw it coming our way, floating in the air like a lethal poison, that kiss in disguise!
It should be declared an improper weapon...he should be treated like an improper weapon!!
After he went in with Johnny, Keira ecc and most of the people moved away we gained the first row, put the flags back in place and sat down on the dirt, on empty bottles, heads of lettuce and some dead bodies to wait for the end of the movie.
Not even the time to eat something we jumped on our feet as we heard screaming.
Looking up we saw them out on the balcony above the entrance.
I lost my temper...
I breathed in as deeply as I could and yelled out his name...maybe it was because an other hundred of people yelled with me the fact is that he turned to us, read the flag, thumb up, then he did the ‘victory’ sign with a hand and brought that very hand above his heart with his “Aaaaaaaaawwww!!” face.
But his foulness doesn’t end here...oh no!
He elbowed Keira and pointed at our flag.
Sandrumn read from her lips that she was saying “From Venice...wow!”
I was so glad!
I kept waving my hand like I was on the docks and he was on the sailing ship (with a straw hat and a red ribbon it would have been perfect), and Silvia, who weren’t able to see him earlier, took a chance to look at.
The poor girl found herself surrounded by a bunch of viragos and she-vickings who mashed her like a potato.
But Orly, the good hormone-fairy, came out on the balcony with a smile for poor Silvia too!
After that it was really time to go.
Security men shoved us.
We hid in a corner calling anyone to tell about him, then we headed to the same Bistrò of the evening before, lost in a multi-angle session of Premiere Dvds.
There’s nothing more to say about it, except that it was a wonderful experience (after all) and that I hope to find same people the next year (and I’m not talking about the Johnny Depp faction of the Broken Cunts Society Part 2) 'cause I Feel That We got along well!
So, I'm waiting for the prosecution of the hunt for the power to Orlando'hunk four'Bloom!
"Come on ladies. There's nothing to see! "The men of the security impel us to the bottom of the fence with extreme caution, while still roaring and drooling. We move
walking a few inches of waste including bottles, sandwiches, chairs, sets of keys and cell phone cases lost in the crowd and try to do it as slowly as possible.
is out Johnny, Keira also came out and they are already gone in the car ... but where the hell is Orlando?
We know, thanks to the compass hormone, Orfei circus that the beast is still inside the Odeon that scarrozza his apetite carcass lopsided pitch, but then why not come out?
But security guards are relentless and govern us to throw off the fence within which we were closed for 13 hours ...
stagger through the piles to try bicycle Leicester Square, while the other pens, even popping of saliva, some girls shouting obscene proposals stalwart guards.
Rosanna, Silvia, Raffi, and I reach the Sandruman Tonny & Co intent juicy details to share with three other girls veterans by Her Majesty The Light in the head and three seconds to open a unit of mobile phone telling you what happened to everyone we can think of to call.
staggered, as best I can dodge the cops, the bulldozers and the fences and stray I call my father.
"Father! Santa! We saw it! "
" Eh ... "
" We gave him the picture! He was happy! "
" Ah ... "
" Then we saw Johnny Depp! "" Who is it? "
" This morning we have ... like who is he? "
" Eh ... I know ... "
" But ... "
" When come back? "" Tomorrow night. "
" We register the game? "
" ... yes ... "
" Be careful "
" ... dad ... you do not care a saw to know what happened? "
" It yes, as no "
" We've seen and ... "
" Brave "
" ... you okay, Daddy, hello, eh? "
" See you tomorrow "
To give satisfaction, definitely my father is in it!
But let's at my feet, there to demand attention as much as my bladder. The obnoxious kind
tile paving of the square do not help, more so as not to disprove I brought a pair of lightweight shoes that seems to be barefoot ... I was in the backpack of thong sandals comfortable but after 13 hours under the sun to roll around on the floor like a homeless drug addict I thought it was more civic avoid taking off .
"Well that's enough!" I believe in pain that now makes me miss the light of the eyes "we all go to the toilet!" And without waiting for an answer in Italian, English, Dutch or German as it was, Marco decided to services. Several gorgeous
screams at the edge of a hunting and porn ass paper later, we all go out and Totti and there arises a problem.
"Faaaame ..." but where, say, where to eat?
"THE COURSE OF OCTOPUS"
We were at the Warner Village Cinema, about a month and a half earlier.
In particular, the one time we went to amuse hormones with 'Ask the Dust'.
I was already anticipating the wickedness of Colin Farrell that makes me Betta
"Erica! I've got to give you some news! "With the smiling face of her ass.
"Oh my God ... and now what?" Puff. I'm afraid when he does that and she knows it.
"Orlando will be in London on July 3rd for the premiere of the Curse 2 ..."
moan of pain "No ..."
Svolazzar di sopracciglia “Vieni con me?”
“Che cazzo di domande fai! Ovvio che vengo con te, cretina!”
“Non vedo l’ora!” felicissima e determinata.
“Io no!…” con la faccia a pena di morte.
“Perché???” esterrefatta.
L’ho guardata quanto più eloquentemente possibile “Perché a stà girata so ESATTAMENTE quale inferno del cazzo mi aspetta!!!” La Betta ci pensa un secondo, poi mi fa “Pare che ci sia anche Johnny Depp!” L’anima m’abbandona “Ecco…ora si che sono più tranquilla…” Immediatamente Sandra and Raffaella goes in search of plane tickets and a hotel as I can: I do not have internet for seven months, I liberate the telecom carrier because they all have the mother pig!
Back to us ... the Yellow, with motionless hands sad bunny, this time there can be, and has had to make a very difficult choice: London and adore the food on the plane, or marry the man of her dreams?
Less evil is coming!
I wonder how we would be upset when those bastards rabbis of the Meridian do not have no lunch served on a flight that departed at 13.30, or dinner on a flight that departed at 19.15.
recommend dispassionately to choose another airline to fly, one that not only serves stuff at double the price and even then it has only 3 sandwiches all ... after a plane ticket for 220 euro, they could do better.
So at this point the group seems to be composed as follows:
-
Sandruman
called Sandra or Betta Miss_Muffin or with the alternate personality of Mac Guyver and Wonder Woman and the hormonal function of troublemakers, vomits pig, carcass weight and rapes pillows.
- Raffaella
called Raffie Nanakomatsu and let's stop here or else you do at night, with the function to deal with double beds, filthy smarritrice of socks, a victim of airport security and major shareholder of Omnitel.
- Rosanna
called Ewyn that does not rise to the simple task of CaronCiceroPastorAngelocustode, promoter of culture (because sa: ALL!), Bard chamber, Japanese photographer and massage ends.
- Silvia
or Elf or Alles or feet, the gust of freshness of the group, had the task of smiling always happy, enthusiastic about every corner of London and discourage vulgar pig Sandra with a heartbeat eyelashes. And finally
-
Moi, said Erica said Belda, with the function of court scribe, factory crap, addicted to football (and players) and vice-president of the Frappuccino
Fan Club
I, Raffi Sandruman we left Florence-Peretola June 30 to peck at the hotel with the other two.
_22 Giugno_ The Sandra calls me on the phone "Ericheit, are you tonight?"
"Mmmm ... yes ... why?" "Why does the banner tonight for the premiere!" "Yes? ... And which we intend to humiliate year sentence? "
" I wrote it Ewyn, listen: From Venice, to London Through Sanremo: Thanks Mr. Bloom! "or as he wrote Sandra during a test 'blooli'
quartered a sheet of Grandma Juliet chasing us with beaters screaming "Wild!" and we get to work reviving the masks used last year, while seeking to bring the word 'San Remo' with a 'through' the Yellow looks up to me shaking his big head yellow "As I see gray!"
But in the end, sweaty as mercenaries, we succeed and the banner is ready with lots of smiley faces and hearts.
Simple but nice, no? After the banner is the time of the painting, the gift of our poor Japanese farmers Calpestaci to His Majesty and of course who could do it in a day if not RapiClòd, the airbrushing / slaver World's Fastest?
is done on a metal plate and covered with shiny brick then a coach builder for this reason I, and Raffie Sandruman we allowed to lick it abundantly.
Thursday, 29 we found to give the final touch in the garden of yellow, under the attack of a giant moth who wanted to take command of the brain of the Raffie we wrote a dedication.
Then there was a moment of rampant insanity: I was lost in the replay of the head that would have given a time I had seen, with tongue out, squinting eyes, and splashes of flash, and while he rolled on the bed Raffie with a subluxation of the mandible, the Betta says
"I want to make me a picture with him!"
"I would only be able to brancicarlo ..." I say sucking the tongue.
"Is that all?" She says, "You just do the octopus!"
"Sandra" I make them with flames of determination in his eyes "... in the next 4 days you make me a course of octopus!"
"PORTUGAL: THE ISLAND OF FEMALES"
Bett'n'Raff Friday morning had to go to fetch the 11 split at 11.15 ... still nothing, so I decide to call me and Betta vocia that are coming in and out of breath had a small setback.
Did you know Arsenio Lupin had done?
He closed the lock of the suitcase with the key inserted to the loop inside the lock itself ... it was in good company anyway.
Raffie fact, I believe in solidarity, he had forgotten the charger the phone on the table and he's only noticed when you arrive at the airport, I was already singing victory that Papa Betta has returned home to take it.
But I say: Raffie forget the charger? It would be like if Superman
forget the coat!
To check in two hours because we put the girl at the counter was stoned that they had to open 2 other banks do not check in for us to miss the plane! The
Raffie started dancing on the spot.
"Raffie not worry, do not miss your flight!"
"No ... I have is that the baggy pants and this shit from spillettina nurse I have to keep them is too small!"
"Um, hell ..." I do the thickening eyebrows "... what you use?"
"I would take ..." twisting and pulling on the salamander as a compass needle under the nail "ARGH! ... a safety pin greatest"
Sigh "I do not blame me ... Sorry ... "" Not I ... "does the Betta. "Oh well ... it means that at most will stay in his underwear!" "Ahaahahahahahahahaha" laugh accomplice. But something was triggered in Betta.
I see how he keeps his eyes fixed in a ball in front of him.
Party stands for MacGuyver, Betta folds in half, bend over because it takes too normal and complicated system to force the hinges of his backpack.
Now, for the uninitiated, MacGuyver was a show of the 80s who told of this man from the dark past and the life is not exactly linear, it was so educated and so smart he knew all of chemistry, physics, the trigonometroplettica etc.. etc.. like a nursery rhyme and used his knowledge to get out of many troubles that happened. To say ... was a peach mold, a pen and a rubber band and built the atomic bomb, so kind, no?
But while we retrace the heroic deeds of MacGuyver, the Sandra finds what he sought and extracted from a small enclosure and white (with the need for sewing of a flea) to nurse a sword with which pierces the pants of Raffi.
We just have time to run to our gate and refining, was not even a Croatian terrorist, is turned inside out by a virago blonde hue of two meters by two. Obviously I
and Betta, blissful smile, we are nestled in a corner looking at it groped to look innocent as Frau Ceffo extracted with booster pads inside clasps, locks of hair of various sizes and textures, a bingo and pocket any object vibrating
... He let her go only after repeating the procedure three times and eyes ever smaller slit.
Betta and I was expecting to hear just say the words 'body cavity search', but we were disappointed.
Fortunately, the flight goes well, sense of suction of the internal organs apart. There were
monitor on almost every row of seats showing altitude, speed, travel time and temperature outside the airplane, and the path in real time ... they certainly have installed with the money saved from lunch ... so, to 39,000 feet altitude, I could see perfectly the coasts of Normandy and the arrival on the Brighton perched on the sea!
Just landed in British soil, when we were sitting, do we hear from the speaker above our heads "... encouraging you to get to know our wildlife ... Portugal: the island of females!"
"the Knight Bus"
"Okay, we got it wrong!"
By shrug go down to Gatwick, only this time they are prepared to hushed silence, we take your bags and looking for the Gatwick Express to pass by a store of fresh muffins.
"Yayyy!" Cry, because in the absence of Claudia someone has to scream. I do not care
whirling hands and ask him a blueberry while lutrumosa Raffie take a double chocolate, and desirous slobbering, terrifying the clerk. The Sandra
anything, because she lives ed'Orlando air and then they can always build a pizza oven with a hair slide, a spoon and a rubber ball.
Once you get on the train and systems are attacked by the desire to converse amiably with my Compagnucci Travel on our first impressions, I look up and see so
... no time to breathe a sigh of relief that have already checked the phones and texting are all happy, even the Betta with two hands and refining so fast that you do not even see the thumb.
close my eyes a crack and hiss, "If this is what you intend to do during your stay, you tear those phones out of hand, I turn off the vibration and I put them there Culu IN!"
laugh, totally unaware that oh! Yes it will! although lower gear so that both I and the Raffie we're ready to taste our muffin. tried, his eyebrows dancing, to steal the result of game from those big ass sleeping next to us even though they had a portable LCD TV, when Raffie, just to make it clear what was going on holiday, she screams "... WITH THE CHOCOLATE rimming!" shouted Maybe on a train Italy understands a person around the car, while in England ... well ... it's in English! run away from Victoria Station by train, metro and c'infiliamo Sailing to Earl's Court. There are only two lines in London, the green and yellow that make me swear like an ogre every time I take them, passing on the same track, I do not remember ever you should look at what is and where it goes in front of the train . This year and for a case entirely by chance, I took the right one, only that I had read that also passed Sloane Square.
"NO! We were wrong! All down! "Scream just read the name of the station and there scapicolliamo on the platform. Happy
of essermene noticed I look around, pull out the map, control ... we were on the right. I look up and the meter was still there, full of people watching us curiously.
and dazzling smile in a whisper, without moving your lips "Pretend you're nothing, we take the next ..."
When you finally go out in Earl's Court Road are like a bag of greasy fried fish and sweaty in August that a builder does not suck; us stopped a few paces beyond the entrance to the metro "Well ... we're the street where the hotel!"
I reach into my backpack, pull out the London Street Finder and I do not even time to open that
'FHUU!'
materializes beside us all smiling a little old man who makes us "Are you lost?"
Flap-flap ... blink of an eye and three seconds to figure out where he came from ...
"Er ... yes ... I mean, no ..."
"What street are you looking for?" more and more happy.
"Er ... ... Cromwell Road" really knew very well where it was, but it was so English incredibly this thing, we wanted to enjoy it all.
"Ah! Fine ... "is preparing to explain, then looks at us, I look and asks," What hotel are you looking for? ... "Frowns, then is" What is ... ... Hotel looking for? "And we
" MA! He speaks Italian! "... Mountains.
So, happy beyond words, begins to explain alternating some few words of Italian to English "And after the ... how do you say 'traffic light' in Italian?"
And I enjoyed it more and more "traffic light"
E him, that he enjoyed more than me "AH!" happy "FEMAFORO" The
looked shocked, a bit 'like watching a cat playing the violin, then suddenly exclaimed, "And there's a GRANDISSSSIMA STRAADAAAA"
When we said goodbye and thanked us almost sorry to see him go .
Seriously ... it jumped out of nowhere, not even had been lurking all day waiting for someone to put out a map, rather like the baton with the Knight Bus!
"TOTTEEEEEY!"
Going down I long in my eyes I see all the pubs to find where I watched the game in Italy that evening. Falls
Jesus, I had to see that game!
National teams are the only teams that I like to see play ... I am a football purist.
English football made by the British, Italian by Italian, German by the Germans, the French ... well, French by Africans, let's face it all. In
hotel after giving us the key to happily tell us that we are English and half in the 4th floor. For a moment I feared really happen like last year at the Garden View, where s'arrostiva hot elevator was broken.
I almost had heard the boy exclaims, "Ui haba lift!" Just as it is written and said in a When we go on, because more than one with the suitcase was not even there to pray cinegrese.
I go on first.
fuller 4th floor assisted by my sweat has run ten-fold increase in the short run (what the fuck there is carpet on the walls of the lift ?!?!?!) by in horror, throwing her suitcase in a corner, open the process, and scream when you hear the Raffie
exclaimed "God! What room of shit ... well, I'm going to pee ... "
But think about it and what it costs ('na shit) is not bad.
Pandruman and I take the single bed and a half by the window while the large ass of Raffie the other, with 2 pillows and everything for him ... damn ... I'm the only one that undoes most of the suitcase, bravely hanging my clothes in the closet: a hole in the wall lined with summarily un'aggiacciante greenish paper and closed with two half-boards fitted knob. Crutches, except two, are like those of the film 'Mummy darling'
"Cristiiina! What does a $ 300 dress on a hanger iron! ... Eh? "
" ... no mommy! ... Aaaahhh! "" It i'bbagno? Pulit'ì'bbagno ... did you? Andiam'a'ppulir'ì'bbagnooo " raffia hanging only three things in danger of forgetting, on the other hand, however, manage to lose the envelope of Nuvenia Ali & Penne with Teachers in the clips and even a whole bag of filthy socks. The Betta did not undo anything. Nestled in a corner of her suitcase that opens and closes every morning and evening without a trace of self ... except of course that on my pillow ... ...
We then knock on the door and Ewyn Alles, that Rosanna and Silvia were returning from a expansion of their cultural revolutions, as we always do in these cases, we compare our rooms. Theirs was smaller but with the larger bathroom and beautiful and I and the others envy us abandon for about 3 minutes.
After that it was the turn of the shower without a bidet in the bathroom, no windows broken and the vacuum cleaner: washing the Betta (30 seconds flat as dressing), raffia (40 minutes by gargling screams from sudden slips and nap in the shower) and when it's up to me is like stepping into a geyser.
There is a fog so dense that I have to put fins and snorkel to get to the tank.
We decide to always leave the door open ... except for a couple of times and I Raffie rotten worse than before we went out and then we innocently ask "But why the fuck I held the door shut?" While
yell "Hurry hurry ! Start game! Presto! "Raffie and stumbles a bit 'everywhere (let's say that he tried hard to split his face in the room for 5 days) we go out, agree with others that we have reached wherever they had stopped the fury of my football.
The Betta, knowing me, I was ordered to refrain, you never know they were all full of beer and for Ukraine, but had not calculated Ewyn: with a handful of chips on the fork stuck screaming like a Viking from any act of 'Italy! Fortunately
and strange, they were all for Italy.
We go up to the first floor of 'The Prince of Teck' and there was only a table behind a pillar where you could not see the mega screen ...
At the end we had to sit there with a table sl buzzurrone incrediviglioso chopped fish'n'chips that under the mustache.
I was all in my world.
Eating the national dish in an English pub, drinking beer and watching the game made me very happy ... but I, you know, I'll settle for short!
Just bring us that blaze raging on the plates of fried English for over 150 years, our table-mate's face is ultra rough knowingly, because the custom has it that in English pubs (as they almost there live) you do not understand who you are at the table with more and what is your dish!
The game had already started a bit 'when we reach up and Rosanna Silvia, but the thing that throws me off is when the English chronicler says' Totti'. Every time I panned with laughter.
While Raffa Flesca bad on the laptop he was using a Chinese msn, Italy takes the lead.
"But ... but ... it is using all the Chinese characters! ... But how the hell do it?" An occasion
Among other goals, I hear that Silvia is a fan of Queen as much as myself and we start reason underwear Freddie Mercury when suddenly exclaimed, "You know, when I lived in England as a teenager, I went with a friend's house and Freddie I wrote a dedication on the wall with the whitebait m'è ... almost had a heart attack when I saw the video shot of 'Made in Heaven'! "
auks the Silvia looks at me, points the finger at me and makes me" You I remember! Is that your writing? I can not believe! "
I think it was in 1995, I wrote 'Our Queen Freddie UR! We love you! ' our names and date. I tell her that if I had to go back I would not have known how to find even kick your ass when Ewyn, with the eye long ago, "What is the problem? I'll take you! "
So, with reporter yelling" Totteeeey "go out and follow in Cicero a road in front of our hotel.
"teddy bears WANT TO ORLANDO"
Ten years since I had traveled that route on a cloudy morning ... um ... maybe in February? But I see with horror that there is no trace of the writing and that the wall has been repainted with a paint which, says Ewyn makes inpraticabile the wall for graffiti.
M'indigno and protest, then I point out that 15 years have passed and maybe the new owners had a little 'broken the fucking wall scrawled with delirious fans. There
ritrasciniamo hotel where we were received in spagnosilianoghese, c'infiliamo supposed to trickle into the elevator, and we set an appointment for the next morning at eight Tottey for breakfast.
still remain in the carpet of the idea that there was some substance ... stupideficente before 1:30 there was no way to go to sleep.
A kind of demon possessed the brain is forcing us to make us your photos so idiotic that we have repeatedly threatened to piss on him and be eaten alive by Ewyn that, with the room next door, clearly heard our nitrites. A
this demon must be liked so much that our company has come back the next night and the next and so on until at the end of the stay.
never laughed so much and so rudely when in fact it would have been given to suppose that we were sawed in two, cooked, marches and helpless.
sounds the alarm, a lightning rips the sky, Sandra jumps up, followed by the initials of Wonder Woman and rushes to the bathroom
"WONDER WOMAAAAAN! All the world is waiting for youuuuu! Tarattararattattarattaaaaaa! And the power you posess! Lalallaralallaaaa! "
... to get out 30 seconds after being fully dressed and with backpackers.
... silence ... I raise my head hard, I look with barely concealed disgust and I "... What I have to go get dressed ... I suppose ..." The text does not Raffie. is still lying face down in his own drool and has not moved a muscle despite the thunder and the music. Sandra While trying to wake the Raffie with supplex Antonio Inoki, a 619 and a head to the mysterious torcibudella, I am human in five minutes and I'll get to lovingly kick our little friend because we are late and I feel that Ewyn and Silvia have stuck with the 'Ride of the Valkyries' and we are waiting outside the door with the light of culture in the eyes!
Once you got out and after the Raffie has stumbled three times in the sheet, in the case and into the toilet bowl, let's slap with the giant ants that we had taken the table, lose miserably and take refuge in 5 in a table of three.
Sipping a coffee that was dirty water, even worse than the worst barley coffee, we are dedicated to the conspiracy of the morning program.
"Must I go in an English church! Take a donut to Homer and drinking frappuccino from Starbucks! ... Then you do not break any more balls, "they cried.
even finished talking, you hear a ticking fast and accurate and we know that comes from the head of Rosanna who is planning the route.
Five minutes later and with protruding stomachs of toast and takes us out of the tube to Westminster.
Ewyn shows us the parliament, tells the story and as we ascend Parliament Street, I see a phone booth and takes me an idiot.
"Raffie! Raffie! Show me a picture! "I make by tossing the camera.
"Eh? But where are you going? "He asks as he grabs her and see me disappear into the cabin.
"I do ... 'In line with the murderess'!"
arrive at Downing Street, thanks to the terrorists is completely enclosed by iron gates and guarded by police and later at Army Headquarters, with relative impaled guard that always makes me incredible impression, give a fleeting glance at the St. James's Park, before climbing back up to Trafalgar with Ewyn that shows us all obelisks and monuments that we encounter on our way.
Unfortunately Nelson's Column and scaffolding but it is there that we want to bring Rosanna.
In the air there is a festive peal for whatever opportunity that comes from the church of St. Martin's in the Fields where the baptized children of the real ... to my joy the church is closed, but we deprive ourselves of a stroll in and at the coffee shop in the crypt.
There was a lot of Celtic craftsmanship with which I rub your eyes, but with the logic 'So I go to Ireland in August and I buy everything there,' I do not buy anything.
in Ireland then I'm not going anymore, so I took it twice ... IN Culu! Just when we
from that place of worship & Trade inevitabilemnte see something that reminds us that the world is beautiful because it is varied, but most of all the Gay Pride is at hand!
We thought it was Sunday, the day after ...
How wrong we were!
The next stop is Piccadilly Circus, with the statue of Eros. There
unleashing a photo to listen to the historical cases of Ewyn when, with the corner of my eye, I see something I impesterà the rest of the holiday ...
Maybe not to think about what I had to face on Monday, since then give me to find a poster of John Terry. (England defender)
Meanwhile Raffie takes me to lick her giant. The sign
pink rectangular donut shop calls me like a siren, we pass to one who preaches that Jesus is sitting in the sun on the sidewalk with a microphone and amplifier and conquer our lutrumoso piece of sweet dough, and round with a hole, glazed and not ... we have raised the hair on the ass for a donut and a cup of tea is a detail.
After the donuts we go to Hamley's because Betty had to take the doll for her granddaughter fimbles of ten months.
As we enter is the delusion. There
scattered, some on the stairs of Narnia, who for the escalators up to the guards who six feet tall ... pretty much everything in there, for one thing: the trivial on PotC!
cursing at times because we are poor, we do all 5 floors drooling, especially on gadgets and the Curse of the action figures and reflect poetically to buy some marbles to the famous stand of marbles.
One thing that really cute teddy bear is the country where you doing your own! Choose with your head stuck the empty body, including cats, bears, dogs, elephants, monkeys and so on. etc.. Go to the machine gun cotton and fill, you can choose your pre-recorded voice in the verses of the animals or affect something you, then choose its colorful wooden heart, take him to the bench next to sew clothes and finally as you like! What
romantic, is not it?
so romantic that I could not help myself.
I appropinquata pitch lopsided eyes and a slit to the basket with small white plastic square registratorini, I began to grasp one by one and record "Orlando vooooglio you!" A cavernous voice and Saving Silverman.
After a while, 'the Raffie I found that I laughed and pulled away evil thinking of the poor wretch that he heard the explosion of my hormones, albeit in Italian ... the tone was enough!
'wives HENRY VIII "
Once we find out in the main street, only an hour before sgormbra and Linda, all fenced and there is a question" What is now the Gay Pride? "
Then we take a front row seat under a hot sun because it can not bear to miss!
begin to arrive armed with the first whistle to incite the crowd but the wagons and drag queens the strength of the event!
I enjoy taking pictures like crazy and continue thinking that there are a couple of friends who burst to be in my place right now ... I even ancestry a little bit to be honest, why spend that much better and stuff that I do not think that those will never even a little bit and not even by mistake puts me on a certain sadness ...
After about half an hour I start to feel your brain swell and I seek refuge with the Betta in Hamleys , since even the Silvia was going to erect legs we decided to go to eat at Starbucks (SIIIII! !!!).
my joy when I sat with my pickles & cheddar sandwiches and my frappuccino I let you imagine!
Right after lunch we decide to separate.
I absolutely had to go and see the England game in a pub drinking beer and perhaps prolonging his eyes on some bell'inglese while they would go to the National Gallery.
I was sorry a bit 'not to see it, but I do not think I will get time soon to be in England for their World Cup, while the National Gallery from there do not move anyone! We go to Starbucks and pamperipimpumpam there's a cock! In the true sense of the word, not a hurdle, not a British flag rose, but a pair of buttocks outside ... almost make sense of how efficient 'sti English! In the meantime I am desperate. As usual when looking for one, the pubs are hidden all those that we are all with entrance fee, at the end they let me in Trafalgar where there is a giant screen, believing that provide us the game instead of the cocks!
transmit a concert by the Gay Pride.
At that moment I have a motion of hate.
Open your nostrils and gritted my teeth in the usual expression by battle, I remember that the road traveled that morning had seen a handful of pubs, so I start to whirl up the legs as I did not care, if it means I had to return to Westminster see that game!
I toss in a little pub peak, with the television really small but it's better than nothing.
sweaty and elated I look around me, because I wanted to see the game in the middle Saxon exclamations Avoid to a place apparently set back, then look a Guinness, grab a chair and grinning all nests to one side.
Poor idiot I am ... in about ten minutes hath been filled so I had to do lip me know about them not being able to sit on his lap, I can only move in the second half, among other things next to two beautiful boys who ... I was just under the TV and had to break my neck to see these details.
Meanwhile, the match was warming but the result was not released, plus the beer starts to work, I was sweaty ice and legs mou. I was not that there is too used to it, unlike the two next to me, already the third pint for half of the second half ...
At one point thrown out Rooney (incidentally, one of the few remaining attackers to England that Owen is broken after all) and I reduce the eyes slit quick look around and assume the nuances of the chair to blend. Once
to extra time, those two next to me started to get nervous, but for now are limited to characters such as "Petit! What a tit! "(Petit is a player of Portugal)
This then will provide me with an opportunity to broaden the cry 'Totteeeeyyy!' to 'Totteeey! What tetteeeey! '
behind us while you put two little girls, perhaps residue of Gay Pride, at least as smanacciavano with obvious satisfaction and a sense of superiority and challenge, which came just to break my balls: hysterical shrieking, cheering for one hour with no sense now for the other team and other things that had the sole purpose of making more nervous the two next to me.
Under normal circumstances I would have turned and I said to go to leccarsela somewhere else but when I was stuck in the crowd roaring drunk, and too close to the shootout.
Thus, while the other girlfriends spent an afternoon with cultured Ewyn stories about famous paintings es'immaginavano Orlando dress Virgin Mary descend from their risk of being kicked out laughing as I had wanted a bicycle and pedaled.
England, As we know, lost on penalties and I turn into Golgo 13
crawling the walls and slip out the pub, before the situation becomes violent.
Unfortunately for the concern I have not even been able to enjoy the juicy and numerous shots of Terry ... I wonder why I politely these guys a bit 'worn out?
in the pub next to me waiting for the girlfriends, relax, and culturally enriched.
collapse in the chair with his eyes bulging.
"How is it over?"
"They lost on penalties ... ..."
"Ohccazzo ..."
saying it all, a little 'I hoped that we would lose, so must return home and land somewhere, right? Later I'll call my father for sticking to the dish and find out where and when they land. Meanwhile
you decide to eat there.
Eggs, roasted ham and chips seemed to me a good choice but the ham was in so many preservatives that if it moves under the light returned an extraordinary iridescent effect.
Raffi Betta drag me to the bar with them if they do not understand something ... let alone the lacchezzi ordering, since all three we had forgotten the name of a dish at the time of paying the guy makes
" It's thirteen forty! "The
Raffie pulls out his wallet, shot hair, eyebrow and dance with velvety voice makes him "yesss!" and smiles with all the teeth that, then lowers his head, pretending to look for loose change in purses and, still smiling, teeth unlock or moving the lips, shelling the eye pattern on the temple and lizard hissed at me "What did he say?"
When we go from there, the situation has already deteriorated.
begin flocking to small crowds of drunken English, some quite young, others very trombabili, so we hurry to the subway, except that, suddenly gone mad, I am reminded of a delightful scene.
Passing the British drunk I hum
"You are out of the world! And Italy will not! Gnagno gnagnagnaaaa! "But then we imagine what would have happened if I had done something like that with raffia, a moment before entering the subway
asking" Wait a minute! Where's Erica? Stop! We can not leave without her, "then he turned and saw me run by a horde of fans was fierce and
" No matter! Let's go! "Just like in the trailer of PotC 2.
After this exploit meet Will Turner to Charing Cross and salute as they should ...
So I crash on a pole just outside the Earl's Court, bounce up Ewyn I catch the fly and reach the hotel.
not happy after the evening I will try to split his head up suddenly pulled out from under the sink ... so! Because life needs a little 'extra pain! From there we
good figliuuuuoooole diligently shower drink a bit 'fizzy water, I'll jump on the bed and do a phenomenal burp.
"SBRRAAAA"
raffia rolls his eyes and I am "Health Colin!" I
, infonltendo eyebrows "FUCK!" And down
laughter.
He thought for a second and then say, "If you're interested I can fart!"
But I still pocket the balls that we divide our girlfriends.
Since it was a phenomenal hot in those days in London, I'm sure no one is using the kettle, because there is no Claudia, then exclaimed, "I have to put these balls in a place where you will never boring! Ah! I found it! Put the tea into the cup! "
* knock knock *" Who is it? "
" We are Silvia and Rosanna! We came to take tea with you! "
However, while Sandra gets elbowed the radiator shouting" ATCHAAAAA! "Mom Ewyn of bedtime stories is positioned on the bed with us all along to listen and tells Henry VIII and his wives. I
Raffie and we are particularly concerned, 'this stuff is better than Beautiful!
If only the school had told us so!
We are at the point where Henry married that great cow Catherine of Aragon, not puolo more and wants instead get busy with the famous Anne Boleyn (who has not had a great idea). But how can
, as is in fact still married?
"NO! Do not tell me ... I guess Ewyn alone! "I concentrating.
raffia, enthusiastic, decides to play with me 'We help you get rid of Catherine Henry'
"It beats the stone and is also married Anna!" I exclaimed.
"No ... not if he could ..."
"Um ... then marriage is the child and then if zifona he" tries to Raffi.
"stain ... if he could not ..."
"returned to the sender with a nice kick in the ass!" I, convinced of having given us.
"Not if he could ..." and I
Raffie we think about it then, seized by sudden inspiration and incredibly happy to have found the obvious solution "AH! THE KILL! "We chorused.
Oh well, I think we all know what did actually concocted Henry VIII and refining except me ... (which I think was easier kill ...)
END OF PART ONE
- Moi aka Belda or Erica if you like, scribe-in-waiting, football maniac (and most of all, football-players maniac), bollocks factory and vice-president of the frappuccino fan club.
We caught up with Alles and Ewyn in London and in the meantime, during the waiting for Orlando ‘take 5 seconds of lead, I’m saying it for your own safety’ Bloom, we devoted ourselves to the beautiful city and its history you know, British Museum, National Gallery, Trafalgar, Downing Street, Westminster Cathedral and stuff like that, led of course by Ewyn the tireless.
...well...with some diversions I guess.
Like what?
...uhm...me licking John Terry’s poster at Piccadilly Circus and yelling with a beer in my hand in any pub that showed some World Cup match or thinking to be Colin Farrell in ‘Phone boot’
...the amazing Gay Pride parade...the Starbucks Tour 2006 with Frappuccino-tasting...running up and down the stairs of Hamleys wearing pirates things giggling like school girls, buying marbles and crying on the PotC Trivial ‘cos we were poor.
We became fond of Enrico VIII and his troop of wives, we almost fought in Camden Town, risked to drown in the fog of our bathroom; Sandruman tried to invent various things with her Mac Guyver personality like, I don’t know, a pizza-oven with nothing else than a drawing pin, a pouch and a wig while Raffie tried to constantly kill herself tripping into wathever came around her feet; all constantly dreaming about Orlamb!
But Ewyn was no Martin Luther King, she didn’t need a dream, she had a plan and went for it the D-day.
For what concerned Alles she hadn’t a dream nor a plan...but she needed mouthguard and boxing gloves if I can tell...
Sunday we all met Tonny, Hendrica and Li for dinner in a beautiful Bistrò to get our strength to face the Fiendish Beeing while Raffie was sweating blood to speak english and believe me I don’t know why someone who sends thousands messages a day in fluent english would even bother to concern!
The day of all days Sandruman, Raffie and I got up at 5 am, proud to be such early risers.
When we got there, around 7 am ALL of the first row was gone.
I started swearing like a mountain man on a wrong path.
Some of them were there from the night before and coming to think about it was obvious...there were also Johnny’ fans.
It looked like there were ONLY Johnny’s fans, you know, like “Orlando? Oh no! I don’t give a fuck of Orlando Bloom! I love Johnny ‘sexy beast’ Depp!”
Well, the Johnny ‘sexy beast’ lovers got what I call an Underwear of Flames reaction when Orlove came, all of them bitching around and wanting his autograph but hey...they didn’t like him.
Anyway (prof Velli, for fuck sake, stop it!!) we had the whole day before us under the sun, with security men spraying us and distributing fresh water.
Early in the afternoon Raffie bursted into tears for no reason at all, dragging poor Tonny with her.
Sandruman slept dribbling over her rucksack, Ewyn took out sun cream, umbrella and studied the surroundings and the quality of the ground in case of a massive charge.
I could not know what Hendrica and Li were doing, guess they were quite fine.
Hendrica gave me a picture of John Terry, wich I kissed and begged for help under the frying rays of the sun.
Calling for Saint Totteeey didn’t help...
So, while PotC 2 Ost played in the background, we fought with the Johnny Depp faction of the Broken Cunts Society Part 2, who started pushing at 2 pm ‘cos we made the outrageous mistake of leaving some air between us and the first row.
But lets head towards the apparition of Orlager.
First came Johnny, white hat, sunglasses, bright clothes, gold teeth and with those Captain Jack Sparrow teeth he smiled to Sandruman who, don’t ask I don’t know, laughed him to scorn...
“What did you do yesterday?”
“Oh, nothing special...bought some lettuce, been at work and laughed Johnny Depp to scorn...”
After that she told me the Phantom Menace was approaching on our left.
Sweet Jesus I can see his hair!!
As usual I’m almost out of my mind, on tiptoe, stretching like a giraffe and on the verge of tears but when he stopped to read the beautiful flag of Tonny and knelt to sign it I really really wanted to jump beyond the barricades and heat his blockhead yelling words of endless love!
I don’t know what that scoundrel did to Li and Hendrica but I presume something terrible for he is evil like a puppy-dog.
While he was signing and killing girls with that (forbidden) smile of his, he din’t notice the shaky hand lurking towards him, and so he held it.
HA! What a mistake!
It was Raffie’s hand and she left the black mark on his palm to find him wherever he goes with her cracken!
Then he came (...) in front of Sandruman and me.
“That’s it! That’s the moment! It’s now or never!! (and no, Elvis, I won’t pay for copyright!)”
In the moment I started screaming “ORLAAANDO!! IT’S FOR YOU!! IT’S A PRESENT!!” Sandruman the opportune, held out the same old copy of the image when we gave him the shirt in London a year ago, for KoH premiere.
He knitted his Jesus Christ eyebrows and help me please, looked confused at the load of things hanging in front of him with a “What? Where?” face, then he saw the crappy copy and made a face like “Uhm...thank...ehm...you...”
“Where are you looking you heap of hair! Here! This! The picture!” I shouted waving 3 pounds of plexiglass painting on his face.
He turned to me, took the gift and smiled “It’s beautiful!”
“It’s handpainted!” I said. And don’t forget it.
And Ewyn “She made it!” pointing Sandruman.
Not the entire truth but there wasn’t enough time to explain.
He turned to Sandruman and asked “You did it?”
“YES!” she said, hoping she understood what he was asking...besides...she would have said yes to anything he could have asked!
Then she ‘carpe diem’ and blew a kiss at him who (hoppers upon him!) curled the upper lip blowing it back to her.
Damn you!
He should give some warning or whatsoever before doing something so dangerous!
I was cheek to cheek with Sandruman and saw it coming our way, floating in the air like a lethal poison, that kiss in disguise!
It should be declared an improper weapon...he should be treated like an improper weapon!!
After he went in with Johnny, Keira ecc and most of the people moved away we gained the first row, put the flags back in place and sat down on the dirt, on empty bottles, heads of lettuce and some dead bodies to wait for the end of the movie.
Not even the time to eat something we jumped on our feet as we heard screaming.
Looking up we saw them out on the balcony above the entrance.
I lost my temper...
I breathed in as deeply as I could and yelled out his name...maybe it was because an other hundred of people yelled with me the fact is that he turned to us, read the flag, thumb up, then he did the ‘victory’ sign with a hand and brought that very hand above his heart with his “Aaaaaaaaawwww!!” face.
But his foulness doesn’t end here...oh no!
He elbowed Keira and pointed at our flag.
Sandrumn read from her lips that she was saying “From Venice...wow!”
I was so glad!
I kept waving my hand like I was on the docks and he was on the sailing ship (with a straw hat and a red ribbon it would have been perfect), and Silvia, who weren’t able to see him earlier, took a chance to look at.
The poor girl found herself surrounded by a bunch of viragos and she-vickings who mashed her like a potato.
But Orly, the good hormone-fairy, came out on the balcony with a smile for poor Silvia too!
After that it was really time to go.
Security men shoved us.
We hid in a corner calling anyone to tell about him, then we headed to the same Bistrò of the evening before, lost in a multi-angle session of Premiere Dvds.
There’s nothing more to say about it, except that it was a wonderful experience (after all) and that I hope to find same people the next year (and I’m not talking about the Johnny Depp faction of the Broken Cunts Society Part 2) 'cause I Feel That We got along well!
So, I'm waiting for the prosecution of the hunt for the power to Orlando'hunk four'Bloom!
"Come on ladies. There's nothing to see! "The men of the security impel us to the bottom of the fence with extreme caution, while still roaring and drooling. We move
walking a few inches of waste including bottles, sandwiches, chairs, sets of keys and cell phone cases lost in the crowd and try to do it as slowly as possible.
is out Johnny, Keira also came out and they are already gone in the car ... but where the hell is Orlando?
We know, thanks to the compass hormone, Orfei circus that the beast is still inside the Odeon that scarrozza his apetite carcass lopsided pitch, but then why not come out?
But security guards are relentless and govern us to throw off the fence within which we were closed for 13 hours ...
stagger through the piles to try bicycle Leicester Square, while the other pens, even popping of saliva, some girls shouting obscene proposals stalwart guards.
Rosanna, Silvia, Raffi, and I reach the Sandruman Tonny & Co intent juicy details to share with three other girls veterans by Her Majesty The Light in the head and three seconds to open a unit of mobile phone telling you what happened to everyone we can think of to call.
staggered, as best I can dodge the cops, the bulldozers and the fences and stray I call my father.
"Father! Santa! We saw it! "
" Eh ... "
" We gave him the picture! He was happy! "
" Ah ... "
" Then we saw Johnny Depp! "" Who is it? "
" This morning we have ... like who is he? "
" Eh ... I know ... "
" But ... "
" When come back? "" Tomorrow night. "
" We register the game? "
" ... yes ... "
" Be careful "
" ... dad ... you do not care a saw to know what happened? "
" It yes, as no "
" We've seen and ... "
" Brave "
" ... you okay, Daddy, hello, eh? "
" See you tomorrow "
To give satisfaction, definitely my father is in it!
But let's at my feet, there to demand attention as much as my bladder. The obnoxious kind
tile paving of the square do not help, more so as not to disprove I brought a pair of lightweight shoes that seems to be barefoot ... I was in the backpack of thong sandals comfortable but after 13 hours under the sun to roll around on the floor like a homeless drug addict I thought it was more civic avoid taking off .
"Well that's enough!" I believe in pain that now makes me miss the light of the eyes "we all go to the toilet!" And without waiting for an answer in Italian, English, Dutch or German as it was, Marco decided to services. Several gorgeous
screams at the edge of a hunting and porn ass paper later, we all go out and Totti and there arises a problem.
"Faaaame ..." but where, say, where to eat?
"THE COURSE OF OCTOPUS"
We were at the Warner Village Cinema, about a month and a half earlier.
In particular, the one time we went to amuse hormones with 'Ask the Dust'.
I was already anticipating the wickedness of Colin Farrell that makes me Betta
"Erica! I've got to give you some news! "With the smiling face of her ass.
"Oh my God ... and now what?" Puff. I'm afraid when he does that and she knows it.
"Orlando will be in London on July 3rd for the premiere of the Curse 2 ..."
moan of pain "No ..."
Svolazzar di sopracciglia “Vieni con me?”
“Che cazzo di domande fai! Ovvio che vengo con te, cretina!”
“Non vedo l’ora!” felicissima e determinata.
“Io no!…” con la faccia a pena di morte.
“Perché???” esterrefatta.
L’ho guardata quanto più eloquentemente possibile “Perché a stà girata so ESATTAMENTE quale inferno del cazzo mi aspetta!!!” La Betta ci pensa un secondo, poi mi fa “Pare che ci sia anche Johnny Depp!” L’anima m’abbandona “Ecco…ora si che sono più tranquilla…” Immediatamente Sandra and Raffaella goes in search of plane tickets and a hotel as I can: I do not have internet for seven months, I liberate the telecom carrier because they all have the mother pig!
Back to us ... the Yellow, with motionless hands sad bunny, this time there can be, and has had to make a very difficult choice: London and adore the food on the plane, or marry the man of her dreams?
Less evil is coming!
I wonder how we would be upset when those bastards rabbis of the Meridian do not have no lunch served on a flight that departed at 13.30, or dinner on a flight that departed at 19.15.
recommend dispassionately to choose another airline to fly, one that not only serves stuff at double the price and even then it has only 3 sandwiches all ... after a plane ticket for 220 euro, they could do better.
So at this point the group seems to be composed as follows:
-
Sandruman
called Sandra or Betta Miss_Muffin or with the alternate personality of Mac Guyver and Wonder Woman and the hormonal function of troublemakers, vomits pig, carcass weight and rapes pillows.
- Raffaella
called Raffie Nanakomatsu and let's stop here or else you do at night, with the function to deal with double beds, filthy smarritrice of socks, a victim of airport security and major shareholder of Omnitel.
- Rosanna
called Ewyn that does not rise to the simple task of CaronCiceroPastorAngelocustode, promoter of culture (because sa: ALL!), Bard chamber, Japanese photographer and massage ends.
- Silvia
or Elf or Alles or feet, the gust of freshness of the group, had the task of smiling always happy, enthusiastic about every corner of London and discourage vulgar pig Sandra with a heartbeat eyelashes. And finally
-
Moi, said Erica said Belda, with the function of court scribe, factory crap, addicted to football (and players) and vice-president of the Frappuccino
Fan Club
I, Raffi Sandruman we left Florence-Peretola June 30 to peck at the hotel with the other two.
_22 Giugno_ The Sandra calls me on the phone "Ericheit, are you tonight?"
"Mmmm ... yes ... why?" "Why does the banner tonight for the premiere!" "Yes? ... And which we intend to humiliate year sentence? "
" I wrote it Ewyn, listen: From Venice, to London Through Sanremo: Thanks Mr. Bloom! "or as he wrote Sandra during a test 'blooli'
quartered a sheet of Grandma Juliet chasing us with beaters screaming "Wild!" and we get to work reviving the masks used last year, while seeking to bring the word 'San Remo' with a 'through' the Yellow looks up to me shaking his big head yellow "As I see gray!"
But in the end, sweaty as mercenaries, we succeed and the banner is ready with lots of smiley faces and hearts.
Simple but nice, no? After the banner is the time of the painting, the gift of our poor Japanese farmers Calpestaci to His Majesty and of course who could do it in a day if not RapiClòd, the airbrushing / slaver World's Fastest?
is done on a metal plate and covered with shiny brick then a coach builder for this reason I, and Raffie Sandruman we allowed to lick it abundantly.
Thursday, 29 we found to give the final touch in the garden of yellow, under the attack of a giant moth who wanted to take command of the brain of the Raffie we wrote a dedication.
Then there was a moment of rampant insanity: I was lost in the replay of the head that would have given a time I had seen, with tongue out, squinting eyes, and splashes of flash, and while he rolled on the bed Raffie with a subluxation of the mandible, the Betta says
"I want to make me a picture with him!"
"I would only be able to brancicarlo ..." I say sucking the tongue.
"Is that all?" She says, "You just do the octopus!"
"Sandra" I make them with flames of determination in his eyes "... in the next 4 days you make me a course of octopus!"
"PORTUGAL: THE ISLAND OF FEMALES"
Bett'n'Raff Friday morning had to go to fetch the 11 split at 11.15 ... still nothing, so I decide to call me and Betta vocia that are coming in and out of breath had a small setback.
Did you know Arsenio Lupin had done?
He closed the lock of the suitcase with the key inserted to the loop inside the lock itself ... it was in good company anyway.
Raffie fact, I believe in solidarity, he had forgotten the charger the phone on the table and he's only noticed when you arrive at the airport, I was already singing victory that Papa Betta has returned home to take it.
But I say: Raffie forget the charger? It would be like if Superman
forget the coat!
To check in two hours because we put the girl at the counter was stoned that they had to open 2 other banks do not check in for us to miss the plane! The
Raffie started dancing on the spot.
"Raffie not worry, do not miss your flight!"
"No ... I have is that the baggy pants and this shit from spillettina nurse I have to keep them is too small!"
"Um, hell ..." I do the thickening eyebrows "... what you use?"
"I would take ..." twisting and pulling on the salamander as a compass needle under the nail "ARGH! ... a safety pin greatest"
Sigh "I do not blame me ... Sorry ... "" Not I ... "does the Betta. "Oh well ... it means that at most will stay in his underwear!" "Ahaahahahahahahahaha" laugh accomplice. But something was triggered in Betta.
I see how he keeps his eyes fixed in a ball in front of him.
Party stands for MacGuyver, Betta folds in half, bend over because it takes too normal and complicated system to force the hinges of his backpack.
Now, for the uninitiated, MacGuyver was a show of the 80s who told of this man from the dark past and the life is not exactly linear, it was so educated and so smart he knew all of chemistry, physics, the trigonometroplettica etc.. etc.. like a nursery rhyme and used his knowledge to get out of many troubles that happened. To say ... was a peach mold, a pen and a rubber band and built the atomic bomb, so kind, no?
But while we retrace the heroic deeds of MacGuyver, the Sandra finds what he sought and extracted from a small enclosure and white (with the need for sewing of a flea) to nurse a sword with which pierces the pants of Raffi.
We just have time to run to our gate and refining, was not even a Croatian terrorist, is turned inside out by a virago blonde hue of two meters by two. Obviously I
and Betta, blissful smile, we are nestled in a corner looking at it groped to look innocent as Frau Ceffo extracted with booster pads inside clasps, locks of hair of various sizes and textures, a bingo and pocket any object vibrating
... He let her go only after repeating the procedure three times and eyes ever smaller slit.
Betta and I was expecting to hear just say the words 'body cavity search', but we were disappointed.
Fortunately, the flight goes well, sense of suction of the internal organs apart. There were
monitor on almost every row of seats showing altitude, speed, travel time and temperature outside the airplane, and the path in real time ... they certainly have installed with the money saved from lunch ... so, to 39,000 feet altitude, I could see perfectly the coasts of Normandy and the arrival on the Brighton perched on the sea!
Just landed in British soil, when we were sitting, do we hear from the speaker above our heads "... encouraging you to get to know our wildlife ... Portugal: the island of females!"
"the Knight Bus"
"Okay, we got it wrong!"
By shrug go down to Gatwick, only this time they are prepared to hushed silence, we take your bags and looking for the Gatwick Express to pass by a store of fresh muffins.
"Yayyy!" Cry, because in the absence of Claudia someone has to scream. I do not care
whirling hands and ask him a blueberry while lutrumosa Raffie take a double chocolate, and desirous slobbering, terrifying the clerk. The Sandra
anything, because she lives ed'Orlando air and then they can always build a pizza oven with a hair slide, a spoon and a rubber ball.
Once you get on the train and systems are attacked by the desire to converse amiably with my Compagnucci Travel on our first impressions, I look up and see so
... no time to breathe a sigh of relief that have already checked the phones and texting are all happy, even the Betta with two hands and refining so fast that you do not even see the thumb.
close my eyes a crack and hiss, "If this is what you intend to do during your stay, you tear those phones out of hand, I turn off the vibration and I put them there Culu IN!"
laugh, totally unaware that oh! Yes it will! although lower gear so that both I and the Raffie we're ready to taste our muffin. tried, his eyebrows dancing, to steal the result of game from those big ass sleeping next to us even though they had a portable LCD TV, when Raffie, just to make it clear what was going on holiday, she screams "... WITH THE CHOCOLATE rimming!" shouted Maybe on a train Italy understands a person around the car, while in England ... well ... it's in English! run away from Victoria Station by train, metro and c'infiliamo Sailing to Earl's Court. There are only two lines in London, the green and yellow that make me swear like an ogre every time I take them, passing on the same track, I do not remember ever you should look at what is and where it goes in front of the train . This year and for a case entirely by chance, I took the right one, only that I had read that also passed Sloane Square.
"NO! We were wrong! All down! "Scream just read the name of the station and there scapicolliamo on the platform. Happy
of essermene noticed I look around, pull out the map, control ... we were on the right. I look up and the meter was still there, full of people watching us curiously.
and dazzling smile in a whisper, without moving your lips "Pretend you're nothing, we take the next ..."
When you finally go out in Earl's Court Road are like a bag of greasy fried fish and sweaty in August that a builder does not suck; us stopped a few paces beyond the entrance to the metro "Well ... we're the street where the hotel!"
I reach into my backpack, pull out the London Street Finder and I do not even time to open that
'FHUU!'
materializes beside us all smiling a little old man who makes us "Are you lost?"
Flap-flap ... blink of an eye and three seconds to figure out where he came from ...
"Er ... yes ... I mean, no ..."
"What street are you looking for?" more and more happy.
"Er ... ... Cromwell Road" really knew very well where it was, but it was so English incredibly this thing, we wanted to enjoy it all.
"Ah! Fine ... "is preparing to explain, then looks at us, I look and asks," What hotel are you looking for? ... "Frowns, then is" What is ... ... Hotel looking for? "And we
" MA! He speaks Italian! "... Mountains.
So, happy beyond words, begins to explain alternating some few words of Italian to English "And after the ... how do you say 'traffic light' in Italian?"
And I enjoyed it more and more "traffic light"
E him, that he enjoyed more than me "AH!" happy "FEMAFORO" The
looked shocked, a bit 'like watching a cat playing the violin, then suddenly exclaimed, "And there's a GRANDISSSSIMA STRAADAAAA"
When we said goodbye and thanked us almost sorry to see him go .
Seriously ... it jumped out of nowhere, not even had been lurking all day waiting for someone to put out a map, rather like the baton with the Knight Bus!
"TOTTEEEEEY!"
Going down I long in my eyes I see all the pubs to find where I watched the game in Italy that evening. Falls
Jesus, I had to see that game!
National teams are the only teams that I like to see play ... I am a football purist.
English football made by the British, Italian by Italian, German by the Germans, the French ... well, French by Africans, let's face it all. In
hotel after giving us the key to happily tell us that we are English and half in the 4th floor. For a moment I feared really happen like last year at the Garden View, where s'arrostiva hot elevator was broken.
I almost had heard the boy exclaims, "Ui haba lift!" Just as it is written and said in a When we go on, because more than one with the suitcase was not even there to pray cinegrese.
I go on first.
fuller 4th floor assisted by my sweat has run ten-fold increase in the short run (what the fuck there is carpet on the walls of the lift ?!?!?!) by in horror, throwing her suitcase in a corner, open the process, and scream when you hear the Raffie
exclaimed "God! What room of shit ... well, I'm going to pee ... "
But think about it and what it costs ('na shit) is not bad.
Pandruman and I take the single bed and a half by the window while the large ass of Raffie the other, with 2 pillows and everything for him ... damn ... I'm the only one that undoes most of the suitcase, bravely hanging my clothes in the closet: a hole in the wall lined with summarily un'aggiacciante greenish paper and closed with two half-boards fitted knob. Crutches, except two, are like those of the film 'Mummy darling'
"Cristiiina! What does a $ 300 dress on a hanger iron! ... Eh? "
" ... no mommy! ... Aaaahhh! "" It i'bbagno? Pulit'ì'bbagno ... did you? Andiam'a'ppulir'ì'bbagnooo " raffia hanging only three things in danger of forgetting, on the other hand, however, manage to lose the envelope of Nuvenia Ali & Penne with Teachers in the clips and even a whole bag of filthy socks. The Betta did not undo anything. Nestled in a corner of her suitcase that opens and closes every morning and evening without a trace of self ... except of course that on my pillow ... ...
We then knock on the door and Ewyn Alles, that Rosanna and Silvia were returning from a expansion of their cultural revolutions, as we always do in these cases, we compare our rooms. Theirs was smaller but with the larger bathroom and beautiful and I and the others envy us abandon for about 3 minutes.
After that it was the turn of the shower without a bidet in the bathroom, no windows broken and the vacuum cleaner: washing the Betta (30 seconds flat as dressing), raffia (40 minutes by gargling screams from sudden slips and nap in the shower) and when it's up to me is like stepping into a geyser.
There is a fog so dense that I have to put fins and snorkel to get to the tank.
We decide to always leave the door open ... except for a couple of times and I Raffie rotten worse than before we went out and then we innocently ask "But why the fuck I held the door shut?" While
yell "Hurry hurry ! Start game! Presto! "Raffie and stumbles a bit 'everywhere (let's say that he tried hard to split his face in the room for 5 days) we go out, agree with others that we have reached wherever they had stopped the fury of my football.
The Betta, knowing me, I was ordered to refrain, you never know they were all full of beer and for Ukraine, but had not calculated Ewyn: with a handful of chips on the fork stuck screaming like a Viking from any act of 'Italy! Fortunately
and strange, they were all for Italy.
We go up to the first floor of 'The Prince of Teck' and there was only a table behind a pillar where you could not see the mega screen ...
At the end we had to sit there with a table sl buzzurrone incrediviglioso chopped fish'n'chips that under the mustache.
I was all in my world.
Eating the national dish in an English pub, drinking beer and watching the game made me very happy ... but I, you know, I'll settle for short!
Just bring us that blaze raging on the plates of fried English for over 150 years, our table-mate's face is ultra rough knowingly, because the custom has it that in English pubs (as they almost there live) you do not understand who you are at the table with more and what is your dish!
The game had already started a bit 'when we reach up and Rosanna Silvia, but the thing that throws me off is when the English chronicler says' Totti'. Every time I panned with laughter.
While Raffa Flesca bad on the laptop he was using a Chinese msn, Italy takes the lead.
"But ... but ... it is using all the Chinese characters! ... But how the hell do it?" An occasion
Among other goals, I hear that Silvia is a fan of Queen as much as myself and we start reason underwear Freddie Mercury when suddenly exclaimed, "You know, when I lived in England as a teenager, I went with a friend's house and Freddie I wrote a dedication on the wall with the whitebait m'è ... almost had a heart attack when I saw the video shot of 'Made in Heaven'! "
auks the Silvia looks at me, points the finger at me and makes me" You I remember! Is that your writing? I can not believe! "
I think it was in 1995, I wrote 'Our Queen Freddie UR! We love you! ' our names and date. I tell her that if I had to go back I would not have known how to find even kick your ass when Ewyn, with the eye long ago, "What is the problem? I'll take you! "
So, with reporter yelling" Totteeeey "go out and follow in Cicero a road in front of our hotel.
"teddy bears WANT TO ORLANDO"
Ten years since I had traveled that route on a cloudy morning ... um ... maybe in February? But I see with horror that there is no trace of the writing and that the wall has been repainted with a paint which, says Ewyn makes inpraticabile the wall for graffiti.
M'indigno and protest, then I point out that 15 years have passed and maybe the new owners had a little 'broken the fucking wall scrawled with delirious fans. There
ritrasciniamo hotel where we were received in spagnosilianoghese, c'infiliamo supposed to trickle into the elevator, and we set an appointment for the next morning at eight Tottey for breakfast.
still remain in the carpet of the idea that there was some substance ... stupideficente before 1:30 there was no way to go to sleep.
A kind of demon possessed the brain is forcing us to make us your photos so idiotic that we have repeatedly threatened to piss on him and be eaten alive by Ewyn that, with the room next door, clearly heard our nitrites. A
this demon must be liked so much that our company has come back the next night and the next and so on until at the end of the stay.
never laughed so much and so rudely when in fact it would have been given to suppose that we were sawed in two, cooked, marches and helpless.
sounds the alarm, a lightning rips the sky, Sandra jumps up, followed by the initials of Wonder Woman and rushes to the bathroom
"WONDER WOMAAAAAN! All the world is waiting for youuuuu! Tarattararattattarattaaaaaa! And the power you posess! Lalallaralallaaaa! "
... to get out 30 seconds after being fully dressed and with backpackers.
... silence ... I raise my head hard, I look with barely concealed disgust and I "... What I have to go get dressed ... I suppose ..." The text does not Raffie. is still lying face down in his own drool and has not moved a muscle despite the thunder and the music. Sandra While trying to wake the Raffie with supplex Antonio Inoki, a 619 and a head to the mysterious torcibudella, I am human in five minutes and I'll get to lovingly kick our little friend because we are late and I feel that Ewyn and Silvia have stuck with the 'Ride of the Valkyries' and we are waiting outside the door with the light of culture in the eyes!
Once you got out and after the Raffie has stumbled three times in the sheet, in the case and into the toilet bowl, let's slap with the giant ants that we had taken the table, lose miserably and take refuge in 5 in a table of three.
Sipping a coffee that was dirty water, even worse than the worst barley coffee, we are dedicated to the conspiracy of the morning program.
"Must I go in an English church! Take a donut to Homer and drinking frappuccino from Starbucks! ... Then you do not break any more balls, "they cried.
even finished talking, you hear a ticking fast and accurate and we know that comes from the head of Rosanna who is planning the route.
Five minutes later and with protruding stomachs of toast and takes us out of the tube to Westminster.
Ewyn shows us the parliament, tells the story and as we ascend Parliament Street, I see a phone booth and takes me an idiot.
"Raffie! Raffie! Show me a picture! "I make by tossing the camera.
"Eh? But where are you going? "He asks as he grabs her and see me disappear into the cabin.
"I do ... 'In line with the murderess'!"
arrive at Downing Street, thanks to the terrorists is completely enclosed by iron gates and guarded by police and later at Army Headquarters, with relative impaled guard that always makes me incredible impression, give a fleeting glance at the St. James's Park, before climbing back up to Trafalgar with Ewyn that shows us all obelisks and monuments that we encounter on our way.
Unfortunately Nelson's Column and scaffolding but it is there that we want to bring Rosanna.
In the air there is a festive peal for whatever opportunity that comes from the church of St. Martin's in the Fields where the baptized children of the real ... to my joy the church is closed, but we deprive ourselves of a stroll in and at the coffee shop in the crypt.
There was a lot of Celtic craftsmanship with which I rub your eyes, but with the logic 'So I go to Ireland in August and I buy everything there,' I do not buy anything.
in Ireland then I'm not going anymore, so I took it twice ... IN Culu! Just when we
from that place of worship & Trade inevitabilemnte see something that reminds us that the world is beautiful because it is varied, but most of all the Gay Pride is at hand!
We thought it was Sunday, the day after ...
How wrong we were!
The next stop is Piccadilly Circus, with the statue of Eros. There
unleashing a photo to listen to the historical cases of Ewyn when, with the corner of my eye, I see something I impesterà the rest of the holiday ...
Maybe not to think about what I had to face on Monday, since then give me to find a poster of John Terry. (England defender)
Meanwhile Raffie takes me to lick her giant. The sign
pink rectangular donut shop calls me like a siren, we pass to one who preaches that Jesus is sitting in the sun on the sidewalk with a microphone and amplifier and conquer our lutrumoso piece of sweet dough, and round with a hole, glazed and not ... we have raised the hair on the ass for a donut and a cup of tea is a detail.
After the donuts we go to Hamley's because Betty had to take the doll for her granddaughter fimbles of ten months.
As we enter is the delusion. There
scattered, some on the stairs of Narnia, who for the escalators up to the guards who six feet tall ... pretty much everything in there, for one thing: the trivial on PotC!
cursing at times because we are poor, we do all 5 floors drooling, especially on gadgets and the Curse of the action figures and reflect poetically to buy some marbles to the famous stand of marbles.
One thing that really cute teddy bear is the country where you doing your own! Choose with your head stuck the empty body, including cats, bears, dogs, elephants, monkeys and so on. etc.. Go to the machine gun cotton and fill, you can choose your pre-recorded voice in the verses of the animals or affect something you, then choose its colorful wooden heart, take him to the bench next to sew clothes and finally as you like! What
romantic, is not it?
so romantic that I could not help myself.
I appropinquata pitch lopsided eyes and a slit to the basket with small white plastic square registratorini, I began to grasp one by one and record "Orlando vooooglio you!" A cavernous voice and Saving Silverman.
After a while, 'the Raffie I found that I laughed and pulled away evil thinking of the poor wretch that he heard the explosion of my hormones, albeit in Italian ... the tone was enough!
'wives HENRY VIII "
Once we find out in the main street, only an hour before sgormbra and Linda, all fenced and there is a question" What is now the Gay Pride? "
Then we take a front row seat under a hot sun because it can not bear to miss!
begin to arrive armed with the first whistle to incite the crowd but the wagons and drag queens the strength of the event!
I enjoy taking pictures like crazy and continue thinking that there are a couple of friends who burst to be in my place right now ... I even ancestry a little bit to be honest, why spend that much better and stuff that I do not think that those will never even a little bit and not even by mistake puts me on a certain sadness ...
After about half an hour I start to feel your brain swell and I seek refuge with the Betta in Hamleys , since even the Silvia was going to erect legs we decided to go to eat at Starbucks (SIIIII! !!!).
my joy when I sat with my pickles & cheddar sandwiches and my frappuccino I let you imagine!
Right after lunch we decide to separate.
I absolutely had to go and see the England game in a pub drinking beer and perhaps prolonging his eyes on some bell'inglese while they would go to the National Gallery.
I was sorry a bit 'not to see it, but I do not think I will get time soon to be in England for their World Cup, while the National Gallery from there do not move anyone! We go to Starbucks and pamperipimpumpam there's a cock! In the true sense of the word, not a hurdle, not a British flag rose, but a pair of buttocks outside ... almost make sense of how efficient 'sti English! In the meantime I am desperate. As usual when looking for one, the pubs are hidden all those that we are all with entrance fee, at the end they let me in Trafalgar where there is a giant screen, believing that provide us the game instead of the cocks!
transmit a concert by the Gay Pride.
At that moment I have a motion of hate.
Open your nostrils and gritted my teeth in the usual expression by battle, I remember that the road traveled that morning had seen a handful of pubs, so I start to whirl up the legs as I did not care, if it means I had to return to Westminster see that game!
I toss in a little pub peak, with the television really small but it's better than nothing.
sweaty and elated I look around me, because I wanted to see the game in the middle Saxon exclamations Avoid to a place apparently set back, then look a Guinness, grab a chair and grinning all nests to one side.
Poor idiot I am ... in about ten minutes hath been filled so I had to do lip me know about them not being able to sit on his lap, I can only move in the second half, among other things next to two beautiful boys who ... I was just under the TV and had to break my neck to see these details.
Meanwhile, the match was warming but the result was not released, plus the beer starts to work, I was sweaty ice and legs mou. I was not that there is too used to it, unlike the two next to me, already the third pint for half of the second half ...
At one point thrown out Rooney (incidentally, one of the few remaining attackers to England that Owen is broken after all) and I reduce the eyes slit quick look around and assume the nuances of the chair to blend. Once
to extra time, those two next to me started to get nervous, but for now are limited to characters such as "Petit! What a tit! "(Petit is a player of Portugal)
This then will provide me with an opportunity to broaden the cry 'Totteeeeyyy!' to 'Totteeey! What tetteeeey! '
behind us while you put two little girls, perhaps residue of Gay Pride, at least as smanacciavano with obvious satisfaction and a sense of superiority and challenge, which came just to break my balls: hysterical shrieking, cheering for one hour with no sense now for the other team and other things that had the sole purpose of making more nervous the two next to me.
Under normal circumstances I would have turned and I said to go to leccarsela somewhere else but when I was stuck in the crowd roaring drunk, and too close to the shootout.
Thus, while the other girlfriends spent an afternoon with cultured Ewyn stories about famous paintings es'immaginavano Orlando dress Virgin Mary descend from their risk of being kicked out laughing as I had wanted a bicycle and pedaled.
England, As we know, lost on penalties and I turn into Golgo 13
crawling the walls and slip out the pub, before the situation becomes violent.
Unfortunately for the concern I have not even been able to enjoy the juicy and numerous shots of Terry ... I wonder why I politely these guys a bit 'worn out?
in the pub next to me waiting for the girlfriends, relax, and culturally enriched.
collapse in the chair with his eyes bulging.
"How is it over?"
"They lost on penalties ... ..."
"Ohccazzo ..."
saying it all, a little 'I hoped that we would lose, so must return home and land somewhere, right? Later I'll call my father for sticking to the dish and find out where and when they land. Meanwhile
you decide to eat there.
Eggs, roasted ham and chips seemed to me a good choice but the ham was in so many preservatives that if it moves under the light returned an extraordinary iridescent effect.
Raffi Betta drag me to the bar with them if they do not understand something ... let alone the lacchezzi ordering, since all three we had forgotten the name of a dish at the time of paying the guy makes
" It's thirteen forty! "The
Raffie pulls out his wallet, shot hair, eyebrow and dance with velvety voice makes him "yesss!" and smiles with all the teeth that, then lowers his head, pretending to look for loose change in purses and, still smiling, teeth unlock or moving the lips, shelling the eye pattern on the temple and lizard hissed at me "What did he say?"
When we go from there, the situation has already deteriorated.
begin flocking to small crowds of drunken English, some quite young, others very trombabili, so we hurry to the subway, except that, suddenly gone mad, I am reminded of a delightful scene.
Passing the British drunk I hum
"You are out of the world! And Italy will not! Gnagno gnagnagnaaaa! "But then we imagine what would have happened if I had done something like that with raffia, a moment before entering the subway
asking" Wait a minute! Where's Erica? Stop! We can not leave without her, "then he turned and saw me run by a horde of fans was fierce and
" No matter! Let's go! "Just like in the trailer of PotC 2.
After this exploit meet Will Turner to Charing Cross and salute as they should ...
So I crash on a pole just outside the Earl's Court, bounce up Ewyn I catch the fly and reach the hotel.
not happy after the evening I will try to split his head up suddenly pulled out from under the sink ... so! Because life needs a little 'extra pain! From there we
good figliuuuuoooole diligently shower drink a bit 'fizzy water, I'll jump on the bed and do a phenomenal burp.
"SBRRAAAA"
raffia rolls his eyes and I am "Health Colin!" I
, infonltendo eyebrows "FUCK!" And down
laughter.
He thought for a second and then say, "If you're interested I can fart!"
But I still pocket the balls that we divide our girlfriends.
Since it was a phenomenal hot in those days in London, I'm sure no one is using the kettle, because there is no Claudia, then exclaimed, "I have to put these balls in a place where you will never boring! Ah! I found it! Put the tea into the cup! "
* knock knock *" Who is it? "
" We are Silvia and Rosanna! We came to take tea with you! "
However, while Sandra gets elbowed the radiator shouting" ATCHAAAAA! "Mom Ewyn of bedtime stories is positioned on the bed with us all along to listen and tells Henry VIII and his wives. I
Raffie and we are particularly concerned, 'this stuff is better than Beautiful!
If only the school had told us so!
We are at the point where Henry married that great cow Catherine of Aragon, not puolo more and wants instead get busy with the famous Anne Boleyn (who has not had a great idea). But how can
, as is in fact still married?
"NO! Do not tell me ... I guess Ewyn alone! "I concentrating.
raffia, enthusiastic, decides to play with me 'We help you get rid of Catherine Henry'
"It beats the stone and is also married Anna!" I exclaimed.
"No ... not if he could ..."
"Um ... then marriage is the child and then if zifona he" tries to Raffi.
"stain ... if he could not ..."
"returned to the sender with a nice kick in the ass!" I, convinced of having given us.
"Not if he could ..." and I
Raffie we think about it then, seized by sudden inspiration and incredibly happy to have found the obvious solution "AH! THE KILL! "We chorused.
Oh well, I think we all know what did actually concocted Henry VIII and refining except me ... (which I think was easier kill ...)
END OF PART ONE
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